mithridates, he died old
Jun. 30th, 2010 03:54 amNEWS!
I’m keeping most of the awfulest news to myself now. I opened up an Instapaper account to list articles about homophobia, institutionalized bigotry/imbecility, and the underlying 'science' (or lack thereof), so from now on I’m going to concentrate only on things I find interesting, whether they are news or not. (HI, MOM!)
☂ I don’t like Doctor Who either, bwana.
☂ Anything that gets him off House’s Anatomy. Or, actually, The House’s Anatomy Jamboree and Sponsored Advertisement for the Federally-Mandated Birth Control and Compulsory Euthanasia Program.
☂ Ireland is becoming more authentically destitute! The tourists and seventeenth-generation 'immigrants' will be happier, now. If it occurs to the modern Irish to reenact the Potato Famine, they’ll be rolling in American dollars faster than you can say: "Put 'em all together and they spell MOTHER."
☂ Let’s make sure we get this in the correct chronological order, shall we? So, the police in Belgium raided the seat of the Catholic Church there, as part of an ongoing investigation into sex abuse by priests and clerics. This made the child psychologist who is in charge of the Church’s own investigation into its own abuses cwwwy wike a widdlw gurw. Then, some cardinal complained that some other cardinal, who is apparently a child molester, wasn’t dealt with swiftly or harshly enough. That made the Pope mad! Boy, did that ever make the Pope mad. It made the Pope mad because where the Pope lives, it is apparently the 15th fucking century. If the police in Brussels can somehow find a way to use a time machine to travel to the Vatican — which has thus far managed to maintain its horrendous autonomy because, again, it exists in the 15th fucking century — and arrest everybody who lives there on strong suspicion of being appalling motherfuckers, I think the world will be a slightly less miserable place. Also, Cardinal Complainer is probably going to be the next Pope! Because, in additional to being pedophiles, Catholic clerics are evidently also masochists.
☂ If there were really a God, this nice lady would be the Pope, and the world really would be a better place. (WARNING: Get the Kleenexes before you read this story.)
☂ “If you want to create a movement, take it a little slower.” By which he meant "monosyllabically." And hand out free cars. American audiences are suckers for a free car.
☂ There are people who think Devon Aoki is funny-looking? Wow. Glasses are cool now, guys. Also, cutest Hollywood couple ever (if they’re actually dating). Also, this is the first interesting-looking movie I’ve seen advertised in ages. Yippee!
☂ Gay people even have better tasteless criminals.
☂ I kind of love Lainey (can you tell?) — and this article is one of the primary reasons. She’s a total snob, a label whore, and scold… and she adores Harry Potter. If she were a dude, I shudder to even fucking think. (The movie itself looks almost as bad as the last one.) (Except for Snape, of course.)
AND THEN:
Lastly, and SPEAKING OF HARRY POTTER, here is a space photo of a big scary "tower" in the 'Scorpius' constellation. A big, scary tower. Yes, indeedy. That’s a tower! It sure is. A scary, scary tower. A tower. That’s scary! (It’s a tower.)
I’m keeping most of the awfulest news to myself now. I opened up an Instapaper account to list articles about homophobia, institutionalized bigotry/imbecility, and the underlying 'science' (or lack thereof), so from now on I’m going to concentrate only on things I find interesting, whether they are news or not. (HI, MOM!)
☂ I don’t like Doctor Who either, bwana.
☂ Anything that gets him off House’s Anatomy. Or, actually, The House’s Anatomy Jamboree and Sponsored Advertisement for the Federally-Mandated Birth Control and Compulsory Euthanasia Program.
☂ Ireland is becoming more authentically destitute! The tourists and seventeenth-generation 'immigrants' will be happier, now. If it occurs to the modern Irish to reenact the Potato Famine, they’ll be rolling in American dollars faster than you can say: "Put 'em all together and they spell MOTHER."
☂ Let’s make sure we get this in the correct chronological order, shall we? So, the police in Belgium raided the seat of the Catholic Church there, as part of an ongoing investigation into sex abuse by priests and clerics. This made the child psychologist who is in charge of the Church’s own investigation into its own abuses cwwwy wike a widdlw gurw. Then, some cardinal complained that some other cardinal, who is apparently a child molester, wasn’t dealt with swiftly or harshly enough. That made the Pope mad! Boy, did that ever make the Pope mad. It made the Pope mad because where the Pope lives, it is apparently the 15th fucking century. If the police in Brussels can somehow find a way to use a time machine to travel to the Vatican — which has thus far managed to maintain its horrendous autonomy because, again, it exists in the 15th fucking century — and arrest everybody who lives there on strong suspicion of being appalling motherfuckers, I think the world will be a slightly less miserable place. Also, Cardinal Complainer is probably going to be the next Pope! Because, in additional to being pedophiles, Catholic clerics are evidently also masochists.
☂ If there were really a God, this nice lady would be the Pope, and the world really would be a better place. (WARNING: Get the Kleenexes before you read this story.)
☂ “If you want to create a movement, take it a little slower.” By which he meant "monosyllabically." And hand out free cars. American audiences are suckers for a free car.
☂ There are people who think Devon Aoki is funny-looking? Wow. Glasses are cool now, guys. Also, cutest Hollywood couple ever (if they’re actually dating). Also, this is the first interesting-looking movie I’ve seen advertised in ages. Yippee!
☂ Gay people even have better tasteless criminals.
☂ I kind of love Lainey (can you tell?) — and this article is one of the primary reasons. She’s a total snob, a label whore, and scold… and she adores Harry Potter. If she were a dude, I shudder to even fucking think. (The movie itself looks almost as bad as the last one.) (Except for Snape, of course.)
AND THEN:
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Lastly, and SPEAKING OF HARRY POTTER, here is a space photo of a big scary "tower" in the 'Scorpius' constellation. A big, scary tower. Yes, indeedy. That’s a tower! It sure is. A scary, scary tower. A tower. That’s scary! (It’s a tower.)
