langwidere: a fox-eared lamento character (キツネ耳)
Wheeeeee~!! There was snow and rain and wind last week and it killed my power/phone/internets/will to live for three days, and then upon finally being able to boot my somewhat elderly computer I discovered that my external HD was having digital seizures (it would randomly load and then disappear and then become unwritable or unreadable, etc.), so I spent four fun-filled days panicking/backing up files/buying and installing a new drive/auuugh. Naturally all my shit did not fit on my somewhat elderly computer’s hard disk at once, so I had to do it in batches and wait for my dying external drive to gradually cycle through its various stations of the electronic cross before I could get everything off it. Haha, fun.

Anyway, so, how have you been doing? Good? Okay.

I have nothing for you, go away.

No, no, I’m just kidding. I have… some links!
Click them, click them! )

I’m going to start twattering my links when I find them, from now on. In case you live for my linkposts (MOM!!).

Also I made a new layout for Cynn Corvus, out of that old drawing-ish thing I made in 2009 that looks a Anglo-Japanese lady cosplaying as the Virgin Mary dressed up as a kitsune in a kabuki play. Awesome, I know already.
I’ll put up a new index in the next couple of days, as soon as I find some nice artwork to deface make one.
I think everything else is good for a few months. It better be!
I’m thinking of making The Heart Goes 9 into a DW comm (I should have content going up in a couple of weeks). It would be much easier for me to structure entries, especially at first when I am guaranteed to have absolutely no idea what I’m doing. Also I would have more control over who has access to my translations, in the event that somebody tries to fuck with me (I do not anticipate that this will happen at all — but we are talking about a potential audience composed almost entirely of fujoshi of various stripes, so anything is possible). Obvs I would leave the thing open unless I was forced to lock it. Also I wouldn’t have to make a layout!

Anybody care? Silence = "no."

ETA: Is our children learning? This is was probably posted by a future President of the United States.

langwidere: i am repulsed by wholesomeness. (no idea but real pretty)
My cat had to have one of her canine teeth pulled. Last Wednesday. The other canine tooth is beginning to loosen, too, and will have to come out sooner or later (let’s hope for "later" — I’m actually hoping to wait until it’s almost out on its own and can be yanked with forceps like the first one, because she is almost fifteen years old and has asthma and I don’t want her sedated unless there’s no other option). Of course, she was fine as soon as she got out of the cat carrier when we came from the vet’s office, and I spent four days crying intermittently because I love her to pieces and the only heirloom bequeathed to me by my bevy of Irish-American ancestors is the Sentimental Weeping Idiot gene. (The rest of her teeth are, to quote the vet, "fantastic for fifteen." So, that’s weird, probably, but really good? Please?)

Anyway. So, I still have people’s Christmas presents sitting on the piano. In the future I will invent some kind of new Christmas/Valentine’s Day hybrid celebration in order to clear my conscience in these sorts of situations. I was able to upgrade most of the cards, however. ♥

Loooooooong post. )

1. This Paul Krugman story is hilariously topped with the words "Can Europe Be Saved?" (implication: no!!!!), but it’s actually about the ill-considered adoption of the Euro. It is not interesting, but if you like that sort of thing it could be useful, potentially.
2. This is the very hilarious review of 43’s awesome novel Decision Points, by the London Review of Books. I just now noticed it exists, because it was linked by Wonkette. I am not up in the London Review of Books on the regular.
3. From The Guardian, a piece on the fiction/internets ouroboros which I have not yet finished reading myself.

These are better screenshots of my new boyfriend, who looks, upon close inspection, like he wandered out of Labyrinth, limping, after David Bowie was finished with him. I hope he will be named something like 'Valumphis Stagne.'

This season of American Idol is too boring even for my granny.

On the other hand, this is very funny.
ETA link, because the iframe wouldn’t load.

I recently learned that I am the last person in all the world who downloads fansubs. I think this is because I originally visited Crunchyroll back when it was staffed by, I surmised, photosynthetic multi-celluar plant-people who were heroically fansubbing Naruto despite the fact that they lacked formal brain structures and spoke neither English nor Japanese — and I had my delicate sensibilities offended to an extreme degree. Also, I am not paying for fansubs. Ahaha! HAHAHA! What? Really? Are you kidding me? People are paying for fansubs? Voluntarily? Why? You kids today, with your fancy bullet trains and your Lawrence Welk records and your super-sweet iced tea.

Is that it? I think that’s it.

Next week: Sherlock! Probably. (And the Kindle.)
langwidere: two characters from a gay-themed web comic embracing (melons in love)
I updated my site!
1. I completely revamped Warn the Duke, edited and improved all the articles (including thinking up proper titles for them), and made a real layout. Which I actually like!
2. I posted my translation of Ryuunosuke Akutagawa’s Rashoumon — which took me six weeks to complete! And which utterly sucks! But at least it’s finished! Surprise!! I bet you didn’t really think I could read Japanese, did you? Hm? Hm?
3. I added a paragraph about Draco Malfoy to the Harry Potter article.
4. I also invented a new word, "hexenschmerz" (which might mean 'magic pain' in German, possibly), to describe the feeling of being disappointed by a fantasy epic. You’re welcome!
5. I revamped my fanlist page.
6. I edited all my Cynn Corvus articles.
7. I made a new layout and added two new entries to HE KINDLY STOPPED FOR ME.
8. New index page!
9. Put up a pageholder for The Heart Goes 9, which is the first act in the elaborate ritual I perform before actually hoisting up some new content.

I’m gonna take a break for Christmas, but my next update will be the launch of The Heart Goes 9, which will feature as few as three or as many as five completed BL manga translations. My plan is to devote myself entirely to comics for the next few months, and then start on whatever that new Susanna Clarke site will be called. Once it’s up, I’ll just cycle through updates there and at HE KINDLY, interspersed with bi-weekly translation additions, until both sites are finished and I’ve accumulated a huge pile of comic scripts. And then, you know, Satan will lose his first snowball fight, leading to discord among the ranks of the damned, which will ultimately result in a total revolt — at which point the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse will ride out, signaling the end of the world. Because, honestly. I don’t really do "plans." Ugh! So pedestrian. So touristy.

Um. I have the Garner & Tolkien article about ¼ finished, and the Sense & Sensibility review about ⅓ finished, so I’ll probably be posting them in 2012, after the world ends early next year.

Also! Also, I sent off approximately half of my Christmas cards! Am I awesome, or what?
langwidere: i am repulsed by wholesomeness. (the hair is canon)
I'm doing it backwards this time! Because I am already chasing the e-mail train like a sad drunk hobo toting a picnic-plaid bindle:

My teeth came out fine (I only had two of them removed instead of four, because it was taxing enough to convince the dentist — whom I had never seen before and who was not the usual guy — that I shouldn't have pretty much every tooth in my head extracted and replaced with adamantine dental appliances) (I plan to have the other two removed in the normal way this fall) and initially I felt a little dopey about the panic attacks. But, then they switched me from Vicodin to Percocet with no break, I had a horrible reaction, my blood pressure shot up like a rocket, and I subsequently discovered that the month of high-spectrum antibiotics and narcotics had given me a gastric ulcer. Whee! I'm suddenly a 78-year-old man! Go get grandpa his slippers, little Johnny, he can't find his walker! My blood pressure is far, far lower than it was, but it's still a little high for me (it is usually a semi-reptilian 100/70-ish), so that's fun. I can expect it to be higher than normal and to spike occasionally for the next two months (!!), but I should be okay. Eventually!

Oh, and also: Also, I am now on an exciting semi-toxic proton-pump inhibitor drug called "Nexium," because of the ulcer, which is unbearably painful, and I can't take any supplements. Not even fish oil! The doctor actually told me no fish oil. What kind of a doctor tells a patient to stop taking fish oil? And no spearmint tea, either! No lipoic acid! No astragalus! I woke up this morning with my itchy eyes swelled nearly shut, and I believe I have recently broken the record for Most Consecutive Lip-Flapping Snot-Launching Explosive Sneezes in a 43-Second Interval. Also, I've had to take Albuterol nine times in the last two weeks! I haven't had to take Albuterol more than twice a year for a decade.

It could have been far worse, though. Really. Much worse. So, I'm just going to cut the whine with a little seltzer (not that I can drink seltzer right now), close my eyes, and think of England:
You know what I like? Sherlock. I really, really like Sherlock. In fact, if I liked Sherlock just a little bit more, my official mailing address would be: 221B BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH'S GARBAGE BINS, LONDON, ENGLAND NW1 6XE. (I had to take Yahoo! Answers' word about the postcode; London is very confusing. Like, evidently Baker Street is located in Marylebone, which is part of the City of Westminster? Which is a part of London? I guess? Is the City of Westminster a neighborhood? So, why not call it 'the Neighborhood of Westminster'?) (If I ever manage to make it to any part of London, I will probably be robbed and then forced into slavery by a tightly-knit gang of ordinary British rats in less than three minutes!) Anyway, I will be writing about Sherlock a lot in the future (there will be gifs), but for now just go download it and content yourself with these reviews (including this one, which was written by, apparently, Helen Keller).


(For the first time maybe ever, I really like my DW layout.)

Lastly, I just bought my last Libre comic, and I am now looking for a good free raws comm/source. Anybody have a favorite?

* In American, this expression translates to: Hold onto your meatballs, and don't ever sneeze.

ETA: I just found this review, in which a lady favorably compares Sherlock to opera? For no reason? And then she admits that opera sucks. I kind of like her, I think.
langwidere: two characters from a gay-themed web comic embracing (melons in love)
I don’t think that I’ve looked at my 'reading list' once since I’ve opened this blog. I’ve visited people’s DW accounts, of course, but I’ve never technically patronized my 'circle.' Ooops! The point: I missed it. I’ll get on that, though :[

But, my breathtaking selfishness aside, Happy Toshizou Hijikata’s Hair Day! I think it’s really amazing that so many Americans are willing to put aside their differences on this most special occasion to commemorate something that’s near and dear to every patriot’s heart: Toshi’s beautiful, beautiful hair. Yes, Toshizou died a painful, untimely death because he was a total dumbass, and he apparently enjoyed killing his own men when they annoyed him, and he relished torturing enemy agents in unthinkable ways — but Jesus Christ, did you see that hair?

In Hakuouki, the writers understand that Toshi’s hair is his most precious and important virtue. When he’s bitching about something, his hair is sympathizing with his subordinates. When he’s snarling, his hair is grieving. When he’s fighting oni like an oni-fighting machine, his hair is also fighting oni like an oni-fighting machine — because it is Toshi’s hair, and Toshi’s hair is nothing if it is not a metaphor for a big, sharp sword (see example #2 below). That’s the reason there are so many extended shots of the back of his head; it’s far more emotional than the front. Without further ado, I give you:

It is, of course, the outrage the renegade oni commits against Toshi’s hair that gives him the strength to fight on, in the face of such critical disappointments:

How inspiring!

Hakuouki 12: I Spent Almost an Hour Making All These Gifs (Or, I Think I Need to Look Into Getting Laid, What Do You Think?) )

10 out of 10, where "10" represents Toshi’s hair.

ETA: Changed the title. Turns out I used that one before. (Oops!)
langwidere: i am repulsed by wholesomeness. (and the raven himself telling his beads)
I just broke down and reopened my GMail account. Ew, ew, cellphone cooties, ew. The only thing worse than being forced to lug around a telephone would be to live a world in which social convention dictated I carry around a screaming infant. Ew. Cellphone. I touched it. With my hands. Anyway, so: Looks like someone hijacked my account and then used it to send out a bunch of spam. Heehee. So I guess it wasn’t Google’s fault after all. Oops! (I changed my password.)

And I got my iTouch back on Friday! It is now running iOS 4, which is really unhackable — but it has some nice new features, like a 'Utilities' app that acts as a catch-all for other apps you don’t use often. I stuck the stocks app (and why can’t I delete that mofo?), the world clock, the stupidly useless voice memo app, the maps app, iTunes, the Google app, the IMDb app, the YellowPages app, an extra document reader, etc. in there. Which is good, because OMG that interface is uglier than Glenn Beck in a Victoria’s Secret ad. I don’t need to see all those horrible globs of aqua-button glaze every time I check my e-mail. Aqua was brilliant and futuristic-looking in 2001. It is now officially over. Isn’t it? Please tell me it’s over. Let’s stop using it as our design standard, what do you say?

But: You can also set a wallpaper behind the icons in the home screen now, which is a nice new feature — but, it’s still semi-useless since you still can’t kill the under-app text. So the wallpaper tends to go from looking like a wallpaper to looking like noise. But still, that’s very thoughtful of Apple, isn’t it? HELP US, GEOHOT. YOU’RE OUR ONLY HOPE.

Um, um. Um. Here’s a World Cup primer from Riddled. I’ve been trying to like soccer/the World Cup because it seems to infuriate so many social conservatives here in the US (I don’t know why; soccer is retarded and utterly pointless, which are the two qualities right-wing thinkurz tend to value over everything) — but oh, God. It’s so dumb. Soccer is the dumbest sport ever. It’s soooooo boring. It’s almost as bad as football. Watching/reading about the achingly ridiculous World Cup mess makes me feel like this:

Like, a lot. And unironically.

I ran out of space for news! Next time, okay? Don’t cry. (PREVIEW: THOSE FUCKING CATHOLICS!!!!! GO BRUSSELS!)

Also: NEW LAYOUT! (I’m working on my DW on Wednesday.) And check out the ETA on footnote #2 on this page. Maybe Jesus does love us, after all.

Still no e-mailfu :[
langwidere: a fox-eared lamento character (キツネ耳)
Hakuouki was less boring this week, but still: too much history, not enough Toshi. Also, he could be nakeder, and maybe wearing lipstick. Also.

Okita made a pretty adorable zombie, even for him (Yamanami is the worst zombie ever). I am kind of loving the vague implication that an undead Shinsengumi stalks the streets of Kyoto (or maybe Tokyo) even today. Because, as ineffective as they were when they were alive, shit has gone downhill precipitously since they died :[

(Like, the whole siding-with-Nazis-in-WW2 thing? Way embarrassing.)

I have nothing else to say.

Oh no, wait, yes I do! I discovered that In a Grove had twelve extra pages that I didn’t see at first, and in grief and despair I abruptly stopped translating it. Hee! I’ll have it finished by this weekend, though. Because you care so, so much. (HI, MOM!)
langwidere: two characters from a gay-themed web comic embracing (melons in love)
» In the West, we call this magic super-health drink "whiskey."
» Because I have never lost my affection for the "world news as terrible Bruce Willis/Tom Cruise vehicle" conceit, I give you the exposition sequence from Contagion.
» More news from the Computers Have Taken Over Our Lives Through Voodoo & Intimidation Desk. I am getting really tired of the "let’s blame the monkeys!" approach to modern behavioral science. Addiction to technology has nothing to do with primal impulses. This asshole’s problem is that he doesn’t like his family and finds spending time with them anesthetizing (not that I don’t sympathize; I could barely get through the article). He just needs to stop blaming his iPad and fake his own death and disappear like a normal person.
» I love it that the scientist who discovered the York gladiator cemetery is named "Kurt Hunter-Mann."

I’m choosing not to link to the upsetting stuff. Because I’m an ADULT, and I CAN DO STUFF LIKE THAT.

Hakuouki has been super-boring lately; I’m waiting for TH ('Toshizou Hijikata' — I feel comfortable calling him that because we’ve been practically friends for, like, years now) to realize that the best way to protect the emperor and save the shougun is to tell the Gerbil how he really feels about her ("I — I — to you, I’ve always — "). Or for Okita to realize that the only way to cure his tuberculosis is to lick Saitou’s nipples over and over and over. And over. Haha, just kidding, they’ll all be cherry-pink wangst zombies by this time next month.

Only two more episodes! I think! So sad. If I didn’t like the show, it would run for 38 seasons. (Looking at you, Naruto.)

No good gif material in the last few shows, so here’s one from episode seven:

Maybe someone can tell me why everybody cares so much about this Avatar: The Fifth Airblanger movie? Which is, I will remind you, a live-action adaptation of a fake anime that ran on Nickelodeon. It’s not like this is some, you know, actual thing written by and for non-white people which has been coopted by racist Hollywood. Unless there is some new definition for "fake anime" that I am unaware of, it was a borderline offensive, racist construct in the first place. But, you know, I’m trying not to judge it too harshly (AHAHA). No, really, I’m not — lots of really smart people whose opinions I trust blindly seem to think it was unbearably great, and that this movie is an abomination in the eyes of the Lord. I don’t get it. I guess I’ll just have to chalk it up to the Miyazaki Paradox and move on.

Lastly, because you care, I changed the addresses of my Tumblr account and my Formspring page. For the three people who think I’m fascinating. (HI, MOM!)

ETA: There is actually a movie called Contagion. Wow!

ETA 2: And now I know why everyone is mad at the Airblanger. Even if the original text was a chewing-gum commercial, nothing deserves that kind of treatment. Sorry. Better-informed cat is better informed. (h/t [personal profile] starburns)

some things

Jun. 3rd, 2010 01:21 pm
langwidere: severus snape (i think i’ll miss you most of all)
# Those hoopy froods! If any American political party advocated the proliferation of polar bears, I would vote four times in every election.
# Dear Lady Who Wrote This: Please marry me. I hear Massachusetts is beautiful this time of year. Iowa, too.
# I am Officially Worried :[

Some screencaps of last month's keyword results...

I made this. Such wangst as you cannot imagine! I hate it. Also, when I first looked at the infinitive "言い聞かす," I thought it was "言い聞かする." Haha, whoops! Lots of incorrect conjugational fun for Emma! ("言い聞かせる" is actually the potential case.) (I am 97% sure that boys say "だよ" and girls just say "よ," so if it's wrong we'll just have to see how long it takes someone to send me a correction.)

ETA: 1 day, and fixed (superfluous copula removed). ("Superfluous Copula" would make an excellent name for a band.)
langwidere: a cintia dicker editorial (diet coke makes you beautiful)


Iiiiooouu. Sniffles.

So, now I’m in a really bad mood an even worse mood. (I also have cramps.) Helping me out in that department is the mysteriously over-reported opening of Sex and the City 2: Why? I was not ever able to tolerate (or even understand) this franchise when it was actually relevant, so I get it even less now. Watching other, stupider women play dress-up is not my idea of a cinematic diversion. It occurs to me that stuff like Sex and the City is probably parabolic, escapist fantasy — not entirely unlike Tolkien or something. So I suppose, liking Tolkien quite a bit myself, I probably ought to avoid being the first to point the finger of accusation. It's just, you know, I kind of quietly pine for hobbits when I decorate my house for Christmas and nobody really notices, whereas the creatures who watch Sex in the City are spackled tragedies that permanently interfere with my ability to be happy when I see them on television. And that's not fair. I don't costume myself in the attire of my preferred clique of imaginary friends; I don't think it's too much to ask that these women practice similar restraint. Not everyone looks good in the garbage bags and paint cans with which people like Sarah Jessica Parker adorn themselves. In fact, I would go so far as to say that no one looks good in the garbage bags and paint cans with which Sarah Jessica Parker adorns herself. Including Sarah Jessica Parker. Especially Sarah Jessica Parker. Really. Take those off, honey. You look like the box my great-grandma Maudie sent to the rummage sale every year.

Lastly, this was in my newsreader:

ALSO TOO. (I’m feeling a little conflicted about the favicon.)
langwidere: severus snape (i think i’ll miss you most of all)
I was actually going to post something, but I just had an internal struggle over whether or not the word is spelled "writing," "writting," or "wrighting," so now I’m thinking: Maybe not tonight.

Anyway, new layout! What is this, 2007?!?! (Yes, it is.) As it turns out, instructions are not always decorative, and I actually managed to figure out the FlexiSquares port. I’m not loving this code, but it’ll do until I have the time to wangst over it properly this summer.

Also: I am so never working with more than 5 students at a time ever again, unless I am starving to death and absolutely have to. No, really. Part-time job at the bookstore in the mall, here I come (hopefully I won’t need to resort to that, but if I’m ever again faced with the choice at least I know I’ll have ready access to bourbon chicken and cherry slushees).

Also: I am almostalmostnearly ready to post a website that I’ve been poking at for, like, eight straight months. So I have that to look forward to? I meant, SO I HAVE THAT TO LOOK FORWARD TO! & SO DO YOU!

And now? And now, an elegant two-dimensional faceplant into the arms of Morpheus. Bitch, I missed your porcelain-farded ass. Give momma a kiss.